Sunday, February 6, 2011

The Super Bowl is in Town

Yesterday, Hubby asked me if I was going to be in a foul mood until the Superbowl is over. He thinks I hate the Superbowl. No siree, that couldn't be further from the truth. I think the Superbowl is wonderful. Do you know that in the last two weeks, there has not been one crime committed in the entire Dallas-Fort Worth area? How great is that?!! It's like that movie, Death Takes a Holiday or the newer version, Meet Joe Black, without the love story - unless you count Jerry Jones and his mirror.

Several weeks ago, the news was filled with the great event, and all the preparation for it. Dingy little houses in the neighborhoods on the route to the stadium were remodeled, for free. Wonderful! Restaurants doubled or tripled their waitstaff. Marvelous! Hotels jacked up their prices, and residents gave up their lovely homes so they could rent them out for $2500 per night. Surprise! Taxi and limo services doubled or tripled their prices. Oh boy! Parking around the stadium skyrocketed to unbelievable highs. Welcome to Arlington, Superbowl fans!

The Superbowl committee began running commercials with Troy Aikman and other local favorites asking everyone to be good hosts to the guests in our cities. See that they have a good time, refrain from bringing up past rivalries, and don't tell Yankee jokes. Since it's Troy Aikman asking.... Women love his boyish good looks and charm, and men admire his athletic ability and character.... Well ok. But really, no Yankee jokes? So everyone smile while asking your guests to bend over.

By last Sunday, the national media was all here, ready for the two teams, the Stealers and the Movers (or something like that), to arrive on Monday. Since there was no crime to cover, our local media set up locations to cover the National Media. Very kind of them to let us know how the big networks set up their cameras. They tried to interview some of the media superstars, but had to settle for visitors to Sundance Square in Fort Worth and the NFL Experience at Dallas Convention Center instead. A typical interview sounded like this:

Hi, what's your name? Eric
How old are you Eric? Nine
Are you visiting Dallas? Huh uh.
Are you enjoying this great weather? Uh huh.
How long have you been here? I dunno.
Are you going to the game? Yep
Thanks for talking to us Eric, we'll let you get back to your games now. Ok.

Meanwhile, behind Eric and the newsmen with the microphone and camera, a small crowd of Eric's friends had gathered. They were jumping up and down, waving their arms, yelling hello to their friends, and generally trying to horn in on Eric's 15 seconds of fame.

But like the movies, the bliss didn't last long before tragedy occurred. An ice storm with record low temperatures, and the Superbowl activity literally ground to a halt. Schools closed, city offices closed, businesses closed. And then it snowed. The media turned it's attention to wrecks blocking the interstates, and then to the empty restaurants, and vacant hotel rooms. They showed empty streets, collapsing party tents, and ice cascading off the football arena. Things were looking grim. There was talk that Arlington may never get another Superbowl. Tragic!

They reported on the 10 p.m. news standing outside in -1 degree wind chill with their mouths so numb they couldn't form words with "r" in it. They bravely faced frostbite so those watchers who couldn't go outside to feel the cold could see what it was like. You know, people stuck in hospital beds, nursing homes, prisons, and anyone else who didn't have to go outside to get the newspaper, get the mail, feed the dog, or go to work. Well, maybe not prisoners. They probably don't have a tv to watch at 10 p.m. And maybe not hospitals and nursing homes. Nurses like to give the nitey-nite pill long before 10 p.m. So that leaves my mother-in-law and a few other folks who just sit around the house all day.

With the two football teams tucked into indoor practice areas, the media once again tried to interview people who were walking down the streets trying to find something open. A few brave football fans could be seen in their colored jerseys, red, blue, or something like that. The media people encouraged them to hoot and hollar and show their football spirit, and ran after them for an interview. It sounded something like this:

Hi, what's your name? Josh (shouted)
Where are you from? some northern city (shouted)
Are you visiting Dallas? Uh (like Duh!)
Are you enjoying this weather? Uh (another like Duh!)
How long have you been here? Uh, a day
Are you going to the game? Yep

Meanwhile, people have begun stopping behind them, trying to get their face on camera, waving arms, jumping up and down, shouting hellos to their friends...

And finally the newsman asks them all to give their team a big yell. Some yell for one team, and some for the other and the big friendly group of people separated into two sides and began shouting for their team at the other side. The newsman with the microphone and the cameraman beat a hasty retreat.

Now the weather is warmer, the snow has melted, and people are once again walking down the streets, visiting restaurants, Superbowl activity sites, the stockyards, and the Fat Stock Show and Rodeo. Best of all, there will be perfect weather for the Superbowl. And all is well with the world.

The best thing about the Superbowl? The malls are just about empty. Wonderful!

Until next time, may you have blessings and a Superbowl in your town,

p.s. Have you heard the one about the two Yankees and the armadillo?