July 22, 2014

Ten Reasons Why The Dog Must Go

Today I'd like to welcome a guest blogger, Buddy The Cat. After reading my last few posts, he would like equal time to express his point of view.

In the last few days, I have been much maligned by the writer of this blog, and I just want to say that my actions and attitude are in the best interest of my family. And the best interest of my family is NOT to have a dog, not even temporarily. Why, you ask?

Number one: dogs are noisy. They bark all the time for no reason at all, and this one can't even tell the difference between a predator and a dishwasher door. (Yes, she was barking at the dishwasher today.)

Number two: dogs stink. Even when they bathe themselves, they still stink. In fact, it is my professional opinion that dogs smell worse after bathing themselves than they did before. The other day, mom and dad gave this usurper a bath in the yard. Afterward, the little mutt did smell a little better, and what did she do? She immediately started rolling on the ground and licking herself. And now she stinks again. Falling into the pond may have something to do with her current smell, and I want to say again that I am innocent. It is hardly my fault if she followed me to the one wobbly rock on the edge of the pond where I demonstrated my uncanny ability to bend over to the water without falling in. I think she would have drowned if mom hadn't reached in and pulled her out. (Note to self: try that again when no one is around.)

Number three: dogs are destructive. This little pest has only been here six days and she has already broken my food dish, and destroyed some of mom's flowers. Sure, I like to crawl into the tall flowers and be the invisible mighty hunter, but I don't trample EVERY single flower in EVERY single flower bed. Dogs have no sense of restraint.

Number four: dogs are too compliant. Their willingness to do anything a human asks does nothing to keep humans on their toes. A cat's recalcitrant attitude is not only accepted, but expected by humans. So much so that the occasional obedience is praised as something extraordinary and rewarded handsomely. In the last few days, I've kept up a low growl and avoided both dog and mom and dad. But when I've stopped growling long enough to rub their legs, I've gotten more cuddles than I have had in weeks.

Number five: dogs eat too much. Oh sure, I don't have to eat the dog food, but that is part of my plan to starve her out of here. I have eaten enough dog food in the last six days to feed a clowder of cats. The stuff tastes terrible too, but I'll suffer through for the good of my family.

Number six: dogs poop too much and they don't know how to use a litter box. Seriously, these beasts have no manners. They do their business wherever they happen to be the moment the urge strikes. It's slovenly behavior and causes more work for mom and dad. Plus, I have to watch where I step now. How uncouth.

Number seven: dogs are expensive. This puppy has only been here six days and already mom has spent over fifty dollars on food, toys, and vet bills. When I came here, it only cost.... ok, scratch that. She's not more expensive yet. But it could happen.

Number eight: dogs have no respect for personal space. That thing is always underfoot, always in front of the gate or door, and always in my face. I have done my best to try to teach her to keep her distance, both for my safety and for that of my family. And what do I get? Reprimands. It's frustrating to see how gullible my people have become. A cute little puppy licking their toes now is a full grown monster with paws on their shoulders and jaws around their necks in just a few months. I have to protect them. I alone have the razor sharp weapons and lightning fast speed to combat this evil.

Number nine: dogs can't purr. Everyone knows that purring is relaxing, both for the cat and the people - as long as they keep scratching my chin and ears. The best dogs can do is wag their tails. Yeah, like that's unique.

Last and most important, number ten: this is war. There may be a truce from time to time, but it is only for planning strategy. Every time I am crouched and ready to spring when she walks by, mom tells me to "be nice" and spoils my timing. There is no being nice in war. It's a fight to the finish and I refuse to give any more ground. That dog already has my food bowl (or had), my carrier (not that I want to be in it, I just don't want her in it), my favorite napping spots, my kitchen bed, and my people. I very carefully groomed these people; they're mine. There is only one acceptable outcome, so watch out dogface.

Sincerely, Buddy T. Cat

July 18, 2014

Puppy Needs a Name

I have to keep repeating that we are not keeping her, but she is really growing on me.

I took her to the vet's office and found that she doesn't have a microchip. I also called all the local animal shelters and SPCA and no one has her on their lost dog list. I put up flyers at several vet's offices and will take more Monday if we still have her. The vet's office gave me the name of a couple who have a dog rescue and training. I left my name but so far haven't heard back.

Buddy the cat did give Puppy her first lesson in personal space boundaries this morning. From the amount of blood accompanied by squealing and running off the deck, I thought Puppy must have quite a gash on her nose, but when it quit bleeding, I couldn't even see it. It wasn't anything that a scrambled egg didn't make better. Of course when I put the egg in the bowl, the cat ran over to eat it. He nibbled it, but not being a big fan of scrambled eggs, I think it was just to show dominance.

My neighbor had given me some dog food, but the Puppy wasn't really interested in it, so I bought a collar, a couple of toys, and some puppy food. But I completely forgot we were almost out of cat food. Poor cat.

I wanted the collar so I could take the puppy on a leash into the vet's office, but the puppy wanted no part of the leash. I ended up putting her in the carrier and just taking that into the office. When we got back home, all the puppy food I had poured in the bowl was gone. So I put more in and the cat rushed over to eat it. Aha. So that's what happened to the first bowl of food. The cat emptied the dog bowl three times today. At this rate, that is going to be a very fat cat.

After dinner, Hubby tossed a pizza crust on the deck. Both the cat and dog ran for it and each reached for an end. There was a standoff for a minute, until the cat decided it was something he didn't want, and the puppy ran off with it. I know, puppies shouldn't be eating pizza crust, but other than scrambled eggs, it's the only thing she has shown any real interest in eating.

I still can't figure out why anyone would dump this puppy.

July 17, 2014

Still No Calls for Puppy

She is getting used to us now and not as timid as she was yesterday. We were going to put her in the courtyard overnight to keep her safe from coyotes, but she started crying, then barking, and then howling, so we put her in a crate in the office. When I opened the crate gate to let her out, she backed up and wouldn't come out. I finally had to tilt the crate so she had no choice except to come out.

I couldn't leave Puppy out while I was gone (I was scribe to a judge at the quilt show), so I had to put her back in the crate. I hated to do it, but it was beginning to rain and we no longer have a dog house. I turned on the air conditioner and Hubby said she was fine when he got home. Very glad to get out of the crate though. He played with her awhile and then noticed Buddy watching intently from his window seat, so he decided it was about time to let them get acquainted. He thought the puppy would run over to the cat to play and immediately get a kitty slap. But apparently the puppy has been around cats before and she kept her distance. Buddy didn't attack the puppy either, which is kind of odd because he usually goes after dogs in our backyard. So maybe there is hope that we don't have to have one of them cooped up at all times. Of course Buddy pretended to ignore the dog and went over to eat her dog food and drink her water.

Don't get me wrong, we're not keeping this dog even if no one claims her. The breed is too high energy for us, plus she is either trying to herd me or trip me, I'm not sure which. But it's hard to walk across the backyard with her darting in front of me.

I am going to contact some catahoula rescue groups tomorrow. It would be nice if someone had a yard where she could be safe so she wouldn't have to spend time in a crate.

July 16, 2014

We Found a Puppy

This little pup was sitting on the side of the road when we left for an appointment this afternoon. We stopped but couldn't get it (turned out to be a she) to come to us, kind of unusual behavior for a puppy we thought. They usually go right up to everyone they see. Then I retrieved a bottle of water from the car and started pouring it on the ground and she came bounding over. So we took her home, put her in the backyard, and left again.

And yes, Buddy the cat was out when we left.

When we came home, Buddy was waiting for us in the driveway and none too happy. Not only was that dog in his backyard, but it was eating his catfood out of his bowl. So we put Buddy in the garage and let the puppy have the backyard to herself while I made up some flyers and posted them along the road.

It's been about seven hours since we found her but no one has called and we haven't seen anyone driving slowly around the neighborhood like they were looking for her. I even went to some of the neighbors I thought might have a new puppy and they all said it wasn't theirs. I sure hope she wasn't dumped out here. I think she's cute and has obviously had some training, like not to jump on people and not to try to come in the house. She was not trained where to go to the bathroom though and deposited one right on the deck inside the gate.

Buddy hopes she wasn't dumped out here too. He did not extend the paw of welcome to the puppy. More like the claws of objection. And now he is on his shelf watching the puppy out the window. Tomorrow should be interesting.

July 15, 2014

A View to Remember - or Not

I know I said I was going to start posting more, but I just can't seem to make the time. So I thought I'd start small with this picture I found on my camera.

Last year when we went to San Francisco, we stayed at the Holiday Inn on Fisherman's Wharf. This is the view that $300 a night got us.


At least it was a short walk to the Wharf and cable car. And it could have been worse. Lil's stay at a hotel in New York had a view of the dumpsters.